What is Online D/s?

For many people, the thought of starting their D/s journey has two big stumbling blocks: how do you find someone, and when you do, how do you know if they’re safe? Whilst my Beginner’s Session is designed to answer all of your questions, and give you a good foundation for further exploring, it can still be intimidating to meet someone new, in person, right away. Plus there’s the small matter of me being in England, which isn’t much good if you’re in a different country!

For others, they may simply be fascinated with the idea of experiencing D/s more casually, either as a form of roleplay or to see if it’s something that is right for them long term.

Online D/s is the perfect answer. Put simply, the D/s dynamic is played out completely online – there is no commitment or expectation to meet in person, and it can even be possible for people in different countries (or even time zones) to have a fulfilling D/s dynamic.

Remember that D/s doesn’t have to be sexual; quite a few people use me as more of a life coach or mentor than a BDSM Dominant. The same principles I use for D/s – tasks, routines, schedules, rules, rewards etc – can also work for things like getting you through a degree, working towards a promotion, adapting to real life after being a student, and so much more.

How does it work?

With online D/s there is a greater focus on the discipline, obedience, rules and task/reward aspects that are popular within D/s, since in-person play isn’t possible.

This may include things like:

• Adhering to a set of rules,
• Being rewarded or punished,
• Doing tasks,
• Checking in,
• Being helpful or otherwise providing service to the Dominant,
• …and much more.

These are only some of the possibilities, and they’re all optional. I will always discuss your needs with you first, you never have to do anything you don’t want to do, and you can change your mind about anything at any time.

We’ll communicate via online messaging – email, WhatsApp, Telegram, Signal, Twitter/X DMs, or iMessage. You don’t need to tell me your real name if you don’t want to, nor will you have to send photos or videos if you don’t want to, or indeed do anything to compromise your safety.

Before we start, we’ll spend some time talking about what you’re looking for, and what sort of things you want to do. We’ll also be getting to know each other at the same time, so we can both make an informed decision about whether or not a dynamic between us will work.

Once we’re ready to begin, there’ll be a one week free trial – no obligation – so you can see what it’s like, and decide whether or not you want to continue. You can walk away at any point, and we can also make any changes as necessary. If you decide to continue, then each month is charged at the beginning of the month, and you can cancel at any time – no minimum period, and no notice necessary.

What should you expect?

Each dynamic is tailored to you, based on conversations we’ll have beforehand, but as a rough guide most dynamics include some or all of the following:

• Daily online contact,
• Rules / tasks / rewards / punishments designed to fit your needs (all are optional),
• Reviews,
• Audio / video messages,
• Audio / video calls,
• Following and interacting with your social media accounts,
• Life coaching / advice,
• A feeling of being “owned”.

And of course, you’ll always be free to ask questions about BDSM, kink or indeed anything else!

How much does it cost?

I currently offer two levels of online D/s – note that these are examples, and your package will be tailored to you:

Deviance – £300 per month

The normal online Dax experience, and what the majority of my clients choose. It’s like having my personal phone number (mainly because you actually will have my personal phone number). You’ll enjoy easy access to me, I’ll follow your socials and like/comment/share, make custom videos/audios for you and if you book me for in-person sessions, you’ll get a 5% discount.

Bespoke – £varies

The Deviance level is my most popular offering, but for those that want something else, I’m happy to discuss. For example, if you want more frequent contact during the day, or additional video/audio calls. You’ll always get a one week, no obligation free trial before we start, so you can decide if Deviance is right for you, or if you want something more.

Case Studies

As well as the comments on the Testimonials page, here are some examples of online D/s I have done or are doing at the moment:

Helping a submissive recapture her love of BDSM after a bad breakup and some abusive D/s experiences. I worked with her to gain her trust, showing her that not everyone is out to take advantage of you just because you identify as a “submissive”. We eventually added in more of the traditional D/s activities, including daily “Inspection” which reinforced the feeling that she was owned by me, and also helped her with her body image. This was a Standard package client.

A student had heard about BDSM from one of her friends and tried to meet people for an online relationship. She found people who wanted her to send very explicit pictures and videos which she wasn’t comfortable with, and was starting to feel like she “wasn’t a real sub” because she wasn’t comfortable doing what they asked, like being told to show her face but never getting to see theirs, or being told to do things to herself which were painful. After a few months on my Basic package she realised that what she’d experienced was not the “only” way to do BDSM, and felt much more comfortable and indeed confident. She now has a much happier online relationship with someone I helped her vet.

I’ve had a few people use my services to help them with their education – in particular, navigating coursework deadlines and revision for exams. I’m not a tutor (although if I have knowledge that’s relevant then I’ll happily share), but I can guide you through revision prep, exam techniques, help you prepare and stick to study timetables, and of course I will be your cheerleader rather than putting you down. Whether it’s a uni degree or a professional qualification you’re working towards, I can help you. This usually comes under either Standard or Advanced, depending on how much help you need.

Some clients have been sexually assaulted in the past, and have turned to BDSM as a way to reclaim their sex life. NOTE: I will ALWAYS encourage seeking professional therapy/counselling/psychology, none of which I am qualified in, as a first step to recovery. As part of a recovery plan I am, however, happy to work with people who have had such experiences and help them recover. BDSM is increasingly being recommended as a way to retake ownership of your body and sex life, because it is reliant on trust and communication. My focus on trust and safety has been very successful, and not only have I been able to help people enjoy sexual activity again, I’ve been able to help them understand just what BDSM is and – perhaps more importantly – what it isn’t. Whether it’s a healthy CNC scene where they know they’re in control but can otherwise let go, or just getting used to letting another person see them in a vulnerable state but in absolute safety, I’ve been able to help. Again, I am not a trained professional therapist, and if I feel that a client is not yet ready, I will politely encourage them to seek appropriate help before doing anything they may not be ready for.

I have a number of clients who are keen to learn about BDSM or have a Dom, but their partners are either not into kink, or are also submissive. It doesn’t matter to me if you’re in a relationship – this isn’t romantic, there is never going to be any pressure for you to leave your partner. My Deviance package can fill that gap – you get the experience of submitting to someone, in a way that fits in with and respects your other commitments, as well as being able to learn about how you can integrate D/s with your partner if you (and they) want to.

I have also worked with women who have their own business such as an OnlyFans, Fansly or Patreon account. Quite often it’s hard to continually come up with solo content, so I can act as an invisible “Daddy” or “Master” for them to integrate into their content. E.g. “Daddy told me to show you all how naughty I can be” or “Sir told me I couldn’t wear panties today – wanna see?” and so on. Quite often the Deviance package is all they need, but I can also provide help with video editing, writing scripts and other content if they’re on the Bespoke package.

I’ve also provided FinDom (Financial Domination) services of varying degrees to clients. Whether it’s a fairly simple level of budgeting, or a more in-depth service, I can provide a safe and responsible FinDom experience. I am happy to negotiate and sign a legal contract (at the submissive’s expense) if required.