WHY RISK YOUR SAFETY, PRIVACY AND TIME WITH RANDOM ONLINE “DOMS” WHO DON’T KNOW WHAT THEY’RE DOING? I’VE BUILT A STRONG REPUTATION AS A RELIABLE, RESPONSIBLE ONLINE DOMINANT WITH A STRONG FOCUS ON TRUST AND SAFETY.
What is ONLINE D/S?
For many people, the thought of starting their D/s journey has one big stumbling block: how do you find someone, and how do you know if they’re safe? Whilst my Beginner’s Session is designed to answer all your questions and give you a good foundation for further exploring, it can still be intimidating to meet someone new in person right away.
For others, they may simply be fascinated with the idea of experiencing D/s more casually, either as a form of roleplay or to see if it’s something that is right for them long-term.
Online D/s is the perfect answer. Put simply, the D/s dynamic is played out completely online – there is no commitment or expectation to meet in person, and it can even be possible for people in different countries to have a fulfilling D/s dynamic.
Remember that D/s doesn’t have to be sexual – quite a few people use me as more of a “life coach” than a BDSM Dominant. The same principles I use for D/s – tasks, routines, schedules, rewards etc – can also work for things like getting you through a degree, working towards a promotion, adapting to real life after being a student, and more.
HOW DOES IT WORK?
With online D/s there is a greater focus on the discipline, obedience, rules and task/reward aspects that are popular within D/s, since in-person play isn’t possible.
This may include things like:
- Adhering to a set of rules
- Being rewarded or punished
- Doing tasks
- Checking in
- Being helpful to the Dominant
…and much more. These are only some of the possibilities, and I will always discuss your needs with you first – you won’t have to do anything you don’t want to.
We’ll communicate via online messaging – email, WhatsApp, Twitter DMs, iMessage, or whatever you prefer. There’s also the option of using “Obedience”, an app designed for online D/s. You won’t need to tell me your real name if you don’t want to, send photos or videos or do anything to compromise your safety.
What should I expect?
Each dynamic is tailored to you, based on conversations we’ll have beforehand, but as a guide you can expect:
- Daily online contact
- Rules, tasks, and rewards, if any, designed to fit your needs
- Freedom to ask anything you want about BDSM, or indeed anything!
- Regular reviews
- A feeling of being “Owned”
- The ability to cancel at any time
Will I be forced to do anything?
No. You won’t be forced to send pictures or video, you can if you want to but that is always your choice. Nor will you be expected to reveal your identity (if you want the gift, I will need an address, but that can be a PO box or anything else suitable).
How much does it cost?
I offer three levels of online D/s – note that these are all examples and your package will be bespoke to you, only including the things you want to do:
Basic – £25 per month
This is an ideal introduction to online D/s. We’ll agree a list of tasks for you to complete daily (e.g. brushing teeth, taking medication, drinking water, doing chores), some simple rules (good morning / goodnight messages, no swearing, no getting drunk on weekdays, asking permission to cum), and a reward/punishment system. It doesn’t include regular sexting, or audio/video.
Who is it for?
Anyone who wants to do online D/s but perhaps has had a bad experience, or doesn’t want to send nudes to a stranger, or maybe doesn’t know if D/s is right for them but wants to try without any pressure. Ideal if you want someone to be accountable to.
Standard – £50 per month
This is everything in basic, plus more bespoke stuff like tasks that will allow you to be of use to me, basic life coaching, basic FinDom or financial managament, advice and the option for more sexual activities (if you want). In your third month, if you want, you will receive a handmade (by me) “Submissive’s gift” – a set of hairclips and matching pendant that you can wear for me. Think of it like a less formal version of a collar; no-one but you will know what they mean, but it will help you remember that I’m there for you.
Who is it for?
People who want more than the simple rules/tasks and accountability of the Basic package – or if you feel you need some level of life coaching.
Advanced – £100 per month
This is where things get interesting! Everything from before (including the “Submissive’s gift”), along with as much contact throughout the day as you want, weekly audio or video calls, advanced options like chastity, orgasm control, pet play, more involved FinDom, more in-depth life coaching and more.
Who is it for?
Anyone who knows they need a firm (virtual) hand, a lot of help, someone who has always got their back, or maybe really misses having someone to submit to throughout their day.
If you need something more than the “Advanced” package, I can work something out for you.
Are you really a life coach?
I would like to point out that although I mention “life coaching”, I am not a trained or qualified “life coach”, nor am I member of any professional body. Life Coaches are not regulated in the UK, so anyone can call themselves a Life Coach if they feel it’s appropriate. In terms of my own life experience, I’m 47, married with a child, spent 20 years in a FTSE100 and left to run my own successful business with my wife (in addition to my Professional Dominant business), have passed a number of professional qualifications that involved intense study and exams, have personal experience of losing immediate family and the strain that can put on a person, as well as having travelled to quite a few different countries and knowing the difference between there, their and they’re. So, yes, I feel it’s appropriate!
As well as the comments on the Testimonials page, here are some examples of online D/s I have done or are doing at the moment:
Helping a submissive recapture her love of BDSM after a bad breakup and some abusive D/s experiences. I worked with her to gain her trust, showing her that not everyone is out to take advantage of you just because you identify as a “submissive”. We eventually added in more of the traditional D/s activities, including daily “Inspection” which reinforced the feeling that she was owned by me, and also helped her with her body image. This was a Standard package client.
A student had heard about BDSM from one of her friends and tried to meet people for an online relationship. She found people who wanted her to send very explicit pictures and videos which she wasn’t comfortable with, and was starting to feel like she “wasn’t a real sub” because she wasn’t comfortable doing what they asked, like being told to show her face but never getting to see theirs, or being told to do things to herself which were painful. After a few months on my Basic package she realised that what she’d experienced was not the “only” way to do BDSM, and felt much more comfortable and indeed confident. She now has a much happier online relationship with someone I helped her vet.
I’ve had a few people use my services to help them with their education – in particular, navigating coursework deadlines and revision for exams. I’m not a tutor (although if I have knowledge that’s relevant then I’ll happily share), but I can guide you through revision prep, exam techniques, help you prepare and stick to study timetables, and of course I will be your cheerleader rather than putting you down. Whether it’s a uni degree or a professional qualification you’re working towards, I can help you. This usually comes under either Standard or Advanced, depending on how much help you need.
Some clients have been sexually assaulted in the past, and have turned to BDSM as a way to reclaim their sex life. NOTE: I will ALWAYS encourage seeking professional therapy/counselling/psychology, none of which I am qualified in, as a first step to recovery. As part of a recovery plan I am, however, happy to work with people who have had such experiences and help them recover. BDSM is increasingly being recommended as a way to retake ownership of your body and sex life, because it is reliant on trust and communication. My focus on trust and safety has been very successful, and not only have I been able to help people enjoy sexual activity again, I’ve been able to help them understand just what BDSM is and – perhaps more importantly – what it isn’t. Whether it’s a healthy CNC scene where they know they’re in control but can otherwise let go, or just getting used to letting another person see them in a vulnerable state but in absolute safety, I’ve been able to help. Again, I am not a trained professional therapist, and if I feel that a client is not yet ready, I will politely encourage them to seek appropriate help before doing anything they may not be ready for.
I have a number of clients who are keen to learn about BDSM or have a Dom, but their partners are either not into kink, or are also submissive. It doesn’t matter to me if you’re in a relationship – this isn’t romantic, there is never going to be any pressure for you to leave your partner. My Basic or Standard package can fill that gap – you get the experience of submitting to someone, in a way that fits in with and respects your other commitments, as well as being able to learn about how you can integrate D/s with your partner if you (and they) want to.
I have also worked with girls who have their own business such as an OnlyFans or Patreon account. Quite often it’s hard to continually come up with solo content, so I can act as an invisible “Daddy” or “Master” for them to integrate into their content. E.g. “Daddy told me to show you all how naughty I can be” or “Sir told me I couldn’t wear panties today – wanna see?” and so on. Quite often the Basic package is all they need, but I can also provide help with video editing, writing scripts and other content if they’re on the Standard package.
I’ve also provided FinDom (Financial Domination) services of varying degrees to clients. Whether it’s a fairly simple level of budgeting, or a more in-depth service, I can provide a safe and responsible FinDom experience. I am happy to negotiate and sign a legal contract (at the submissive’s expense) if required.